But does Vera Wang make wedding dresses in flannel?

I’ve been a bit frustrated by the lack of responses that most of my articles here have generated. Granted, I feel like I still know next to nothing about blogging, and maybe this is just the nature of the beast, but it seems like other blogs get a lot more comments, sometimes even approaching a “discussion”. So far it feels like I’ve been spending one or two hours every weekend casting these thoughts into the aether when I could have been doing something more helpful both to me and to everyone else. Not surprisingly, the articles that have gotten the most comments have been the ones with more controversial topics. (So how did those Kathy Lee petitions go, guys? Did you narrowly avert whatever disaster her comment was going to rain down upon your heads?) I suppose if I really wanted lots of activity here, I’d just do nothing but controversial topics. Which brings me to gay marriage!

No, seriously, I’ve been contemplating doing an article on that topic here for a while now. It won’t surprise anyone who knows me well that I’m entirely in favor of legalizing same sex marriage everywhere immediately. I’m too much the libertarian to want such a legal restriction on the actions of consenting adults. If anything, I consider this the most conservative moral opinion I have, because I want all the GLBT folks out there to be subject to the exact same societal expectations that the rest of us are. Really, if you oppose same sex marriage, doesn’t this mean you support same sex premarital sex? (And does that sentence even make sense?) Sure, I here these people talking about “Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve”, but you know I’m never going to let certain church’s religious documents decide what laws should be passed. Unless I get to add some new laws based on my interpretations of ancient Greek texts. Ooh, that might actually be fun… “The ‘Zeus and Hera’ bill states that any man may have an extramarital affair, but his wife may turn the other woman into an animal afterwards.”

So yeah, I could add more vitriol to the flames on this topic, but I feel like anything nasty that I could say has already been said by someone else in the past few weeks, after the vote on California’s Prop 8. And I hate being nasty almost as much as I hate being repetitive. Rather than doing another rant about civil rights, I just want to pose a few questions. I would really really REALLY love to hear someone on the other side of the argument give me honest answers to these. (Sometimes I think that this is the real difference between ‘”liberals” and “conservatives” – liberals care what other people think, but conservatives don’t give a good god damn.) I know the odds of any of those folks ever seeing this post or telling me the answers to my questions are slim at best, but at least this will give folks an idea of what I’m thinking:

1a) Let’s assume a hypothetical situation where same sex marriage is legalized everywhere in the US. What do you think the negative results of this will be? (Please be specific. “The sanctity of marriage will be ruined” is not specific. “God will rain lightning down on all of us” does count as specific, if unlikely to convince me. “I will cry” is very specific and I’m likely to believe it, even though I’d just tell you to get over it.)

1b) Follow-up: Same sex marriage has been legal in Canada for three years now. I watch Canadian TV regularly, and I can assure you that I haven’t noticed any horrendous changes, at least not in their TV shows. A few other countries have legalized it, including (and I swear I’m not making this up) South Africa. Do you feel that these countries have experienced the results that you brought up in your answer to question 1a?

2) These days, many opposite sex couples are living together and having children without getting married. Is this more of a problem than allowing same sex marriage, or not? Why, or why not?

3) Roman Catholics oppose divorce, and do not allow their members to get divorced. If you oppose same sex marriage because some religions oppose it, would you consider it reasonable to make divorce illegal in the US? Why or why not?

That’s enough for now. If you want to answer these questions but don’t want to do so in a public forum (or if someone just forwarded you a copy of this and you have no idea where the original article is located), my e-mail address is robh@shininglakes.org

Rev. Rob Henderson
Senior Druid, Shining Lakes Grove, ADF


One thought on “But does Vera Wang make wedding dresses in flannel?

  1. (Comments from the original post on our old site:)

    Posted by Carmin:
    More to the first bit than the meat of your article: I’ve been reading (and enjoying) your blog but didn’t want to open my big mouth to let you know. I’m an arse ;P
    Sunday, November 23rd 2008 @ 10:46 PM

    Posted by Jamie:
    Like Carmin I wanted to leave a note to say I also read and enjoy your blog each week. Actually out in the blogsphere not getting comments is more common than actually getting comments unless you have a really large readership (like say Mike D’s blog does).

    As for the same-sex marriage conversation. I am really not on either side, and yes I am gay, my ideal situation is that government get out of marriage all together. Instead I would like to see government create a method for civil partnerships which would protect the rights and money of the peoples in question. I think any legally competant adult should be able to form a legal contract with any other, and as many others, as they choose.

    Marriage should be, and really is, about the religious organizations and the couples. The government should get out of the business all together.
    Monday, November 24th 2008 @ 6:04 AM

    Posted by Chronarchy:
    Jamie mentions my blog, but really, only the controversial subjects and the really stupid posts draw a lot of comments there. The Grove’s blog doesn’t get many responses, either.

    Anyway, good post on the topic. All we can do is get involved, and I’m taking steps in that direction whenever I can. While I hope to see this change in the next 20 years, I’d really like to see it changed tomorrow, if we can manage it.
    Monday, November 24th 2008 @ 10:40 AM

    Posted by Lisbet:
    Actually the Roman Catholic church does allow civil divorce (I thought you were raised RC?). They don’t like it, but you can get divorced without any bad repercussions. You just can’t EVER GET MARRIED AGAIN, haha. It’s like being dead. But you can still go to mass and take communion, because technically, in the RC God’s eyes, you are still married to the crazy, rotten scum that you so eagerly sought the divorce from in the first place. And as long as neither of you ever get married again, the RC God is happy.:P
    Tuesday, November 25th 2008 @ 12:15 AM

    Posted by Rob Henderson:
    I was raised RC but we left before I would have been confirmed, so a lot of the subtleties of RC law I’m not familiar with. Thanks for the clarification. >8)
    Tuesday, November 25th 2008 @ 12:41 AM

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